Identities

When I am fortunate. When I am lucky. On those rare occasions, I come face to face with my identity. Or, more correctly, one of my identities. What I project to the outside world. What I hold on so tight that it defines me. Limits me. Hurts me.

Do you ever have those moments?

I think of them as gifts. Momentary insights. They are opportunities for me to see myself in a new way and to ponder if this is really me. If this is how I want to be. If this is limiting me in some way.

For example, I notice my reaction to something. And then see a glimpse of what is beneath it. Like the image one sees at night in a thunderstorm when the lightning illuminates the sky for a brief flash. I see what is there. What is lurking. In the darkness. Beyond the reach of my general awareness.

Ah, that is why I am grasping! Why I am clinging. Why I feel stressed, afraid, upset, angry. {Input your own emotional or physical state there.} I am seeing myself as smart, compassionate, understanding, an expert in X. {Input your own self-identity there.}

Self-identities lead to messages running through your head that are ultimately damaging because they are limiting and controlling.

During the last couple days, I was granted the opportunity to see what identity I had imposed on myself. What I was telling myself. And to see what this talk was doing to me. And I decided to go another route. To let go. Release the identity and let it float away. Even if temporarily. Release. Relief. Freedom. Seeing the world differently.

But glimpsing the identities I have created, questioning them, and letting go happens only once in a blue moon. And for a brief moment. When I am lucky. When I am fortunate. What about you?

 

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